You can't hide fat with big sunglasses.
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
It feels like im being cuddled by a thousand little smurf vaginas
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
Randomize