with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Def ran into my elementary school babysitter at the grocery store. Still hot. And she complimented my beer choice. It feels good to still have her approval
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
How did a couple beers and monopoly turn into a bottle of vodka and throwing eggs at eachother in the kitchen?
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
if i cared i wouldnt have woken you up by pouring a bottle of soy sauce on you.
is that what this stuff is?
I showed him my machete and then we made out in the kitchen
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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