Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
oh, also, we're locked out of the house and we're going to have to take shelter with the hot, poss single, dad next door. i hope this turns into a porno
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
is it trashy that while he was throwing up in the bathroom, i was hooking up with his childhood best friend?
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I have 250 contacts there has to be someone sober to take me to taco bell
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
