when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
whose ass print is on the piano?
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
I left my red butterfly dildo laying on my bedroom floor this morning....my landlord is currently showing the house to people. Fuck can't ever face him again.
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize
