we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
wtf he couldnt undo my bra, i asked him if it was his first time and he said "with a girl? yeah"
apparently the secret to your success is patron
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
This guy needs to come out; I can feel him sucking my dick from across the room.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
