What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
i think im in europe. pls send help
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Randomize
