butt plug
anus plug
rubbish cock?
yes
you suck at this game today
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
And now, by the power vested in me by the state of intoxication, I now pronounce you fucking awesome.
dude, where did you go? french fries taste like numbers
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Unfortunately the rum ran out midway through our viewing and we had to suffer in silence for the rest of it.
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