How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
im sure we could have fun without alcohol but i just dont wanna chance it...
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
My butthole probably tastes like a Cinnabon right now
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
