If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I am one Jewel song away from suicide watch
But you can still look for dick after you find Jesus.
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
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