Obama just said the words "we're all in this together." I wanted to start singing high school musical
i just turned the eviction notice into a beer pong list
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I realized after pounding back 151 and head banging into each other to "the drop" of that dub step song, that we weren't meant to have boyfriends at this point in time.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
I gave him the white girl "you spilled my psl look" and walked away
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
my friends roomated asked me this morning if we went to mcdonalds last night and i had no idea...that is until i checked my purse and found half a mcdouble in it...
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
