just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
She was doing lines off of her friends boobs in the limo at 9 oclock on a thursday This has the potential to be the best weekend ever
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
