marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
