if creeping was an olympic sport, i would be a lock for the gold right now.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
By the way, do you realize that you asked me how much you could get for your eggs last night. And once you learned the price said that you had plenty to share.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I don't have time to shower before my passport photos...your cum is all over my hair...that's with me for 10 years now
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
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