Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Hey guess what I got for Valentine's day? Debt and blue balls.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
I literally just got propositioned by a sugar daddy.
OUR DREAMS ARE BEING REALIZED. THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize