Dual....:-)
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
does it count as cheating if I'm bettering him for his girlfriend?
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
I’ve gotta be honest, I didn’t expect to have sex. I didn’t shave... anything. You couldn’t have been impressed.
Randomize
