Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
the girl next to me just texted someone in her phone named Optimus Prime
...i wonder what he did to earn that nickname
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
im pretty sure the clearest way to say "dont worry, im not emotionally attached" was by sleeping with his roommate the next night
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
What if he stabs me in the back, mid-orgasm, as I sit on his face? It'd be a miraculous way to go but that's not the point
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Randomize
