**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
On a scale of 1 to hungover I’m definitely throwing up at the office today.
He literally asked permission to hit on me
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