I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
Come get me we have a petting zoo to throw up in.
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
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