Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I just woke up and found a naked man on my floor. Looks like Dad had a wild night of strip poker
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
you're usually drunk when you offer. there's one time you called me, told me not to dye my hair red, and asked if i wanted to see your tits.
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Apparently chalking everything I've done these past 48 hours to the fact that it was homecoming, is like a "get out of jail free" card.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Randomize
