after we finished we were both getting water at the kitchen sink...butt naked
so?
then my sister's foreign roommate walked out...in footy pajamas
Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I went to a bar in my pajamas last night. I'll be there again tonight in a wolf costume.
Just think, this time last Cinco de Mayo you were holding me up and finding me passed out in the yard of that house.
DRUNK CANOEING
Please text me if you survive.
LAND HO BITCH
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
Randomize
