IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
I should have known when she said it would be "fun" we'd end up in the hospital
Last thing I remember I was riding on a picnic table being hauled around by a lawn mower with an empty case of bud light on my head...
I mean, who hasn’t been fingered in there back of an Uber?
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