My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
GUESS WHAT I JUST LICKED
I feel like half our conversations start this way.
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
i officially have more pictures of his dick than pictures of us together
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
Randomize
