We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
This essay is so getting done. I am spurred on by thoughts of test-driving your newly shaven face by sitting on it as soon as humanly possible.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
