I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
So "Abstinence August" was a bust. Maybe I'll try for "Sex-free September" or "Only if we're facebook official October"
don't tell me about being eco-friendly. i just threw up in the same bag i bought my liquor in. RECYCLING
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
I hear jingle bells and I can't tell if it's bc I'm feeling festive or just REALLY high
Randomize
