so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
I learned something last night. Strippers can be on house arrest?
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
A guy at my table is reading a magazine called "Cheese Connoisseur"
Pro tip: When you spend the afternoon banging your boss, don’t meet your mother-in-law for dinner if you still smell like cum and watermelon flavored lube
Randomize
