I'm pounding a vodka drink as we speak to make her interesting
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
She's a freak. I've got the scars to prove it.
I queefed so loud it echoed.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
If there's so much of a hint of a whisper from somebody I didn't tell personally, I will cut off your balls with a chainsaw, cauterize the wound with a flaming rusty spoon, feed your balls to your dog, and feed them to you when he shits them out, capiche?
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Randomize
