On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
And then I interrupted the father of the groom, to ask if she was "ballet or pole" in the middle of his story about his niece, the dancer.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Fucking someone because they own a lava lamp is like fucking someone because they have 20 dollars and no concern for their house burning down.
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
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