You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
god is playing jersey shore on new years on purpose. he wants me to play drinking games and die. i wish he knew how serious this is.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Randomize
