summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I did not appreciate your texts about spanking at 3'o'clock this morning.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Unless you count my weekly workout where I drink wine, listen to obscure/cheesy records, and pretend I'm a ballerina...no. I don't exercise.
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
