smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Even his old football coach jokes about how big it is. I don't want to be alone in a room with him and that monster.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I used my yoga mat as a door stop so he couldn't come into my room when i was sleeping last night. Drunk engineering at its finest
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
Then you fell out of your chair, looked right at me and said, "You are sooo drunk."
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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