I'm pouring my heart out in these texts and you're going around showing everyone???
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
Randomize
