I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
we're on our way back. she tried to pants the waiter again.
I just figured out, there are 9 children in this world that I can look at in the face and say "I fucked your mom."
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
So hungover im counting my own breaths to make sure im not dead. The odds hurt.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
So I wore my ankle step-counter exercise thingy while I rode him. Don't fuck him- I only burned .2 pounds.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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