he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
