okay pat passed out under dana's car
You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I wish I had a Tina from Bob's Burgers in real life. She would be the best wingman.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
Randomize
