i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
Sometimes I refuse to go through a door until someone holds it open for me because I'm a fucking lady.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
