It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
Should I tell her she gave me head in the kitchen while I was eating a cupcake or would that hurt her dignity too much?
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
NOTHING IN THE WORLD IS GOOD SOFT
NOT ICECREAM NOT DICKS
NOTHING
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
Just did. I played that shit out so casual I deserve an Oscar. Or am Emmy, or whatever the fuck you get for acting like a boss
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Randomize
