I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
onenightstand. Woke up and saw my nuva ring on the floor. apparently he thought it was a glow stick. pick me up please?
he didnt ask why there was a glowstick shoved up your vag?
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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