she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Went to the lab to print and realized the guy next to me was the one we stole all the beer from last night..... Oops
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
