i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
she got the salsa and pickles out of the fridge looked at me and said what can i make with this
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Found the puke drawer
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I haven't received a dick pic from him lately. He's not even my boyfriend and I'm concerned. I hope he's alright.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
