We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
At this point it has been so long i wouldnt know what a dick was if it slapped me in the face.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Blow jobs in the hobby lobby parking lot, oh lawd there gonna pray for me when they review those tapes ...
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
We watched playoff games and fucked so we could both see the TV. I've now found true love.
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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