i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
