butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Things you owe me: a sober apology, $12, the removal of bbq sauce from my doorknob
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
What's the point of having a gay best friend if he doesn't play with your titties?
Randomize
