Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
