Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
So I just walked into the bathroom, and there was this kid, talking to his mom, while taking a shit. I flushed the toilet next to him and heard him say into the phone, "No, I'm not. I'm in my dorm."
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
He told me that he wishes our relationship was more like prison: less touching, more butt sex.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
He gave me a box of cheez-its after sex, does that make me a hooker?
He referred to his penis as "The Purple Headed Yogurt Slinger." I'm both disgusted and turned on
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
I'M SO HIGH I FORGOT HOW TO EAT A STRAWBERRY. A FUCKING STRAWBERRY.
Randomize
