i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
Oscar is the man. He keeps getting pictures of hot nude women with messages in spanish saying "i hope you like it" sent to his phone
whose oscar?
the baller who i guess decided to give out a fake number at the bar last weekend. luckily that fake number was mine. i have enough porn to last me until next month.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
i woke up between my boyfriend and his sister and i don't know if we fucked or cried together
You know what i hate? I hate when the ppl you drunkenly made out with actually want to talk to you sober. It just doesn't work that way sir.
Randomize
