i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
woke up in a garbage bag. literally. it was used as a sleeping bag.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
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