That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
i think when the guy sitting in the corner singing tells you you're too drunk, you're too drunk.
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
just had sex in my dorm hall public bathroom while wearing my favorite cat sweater. tonight was a win
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Randomize
