There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
in respone to your voicemail you left me on saturday, yes i had gone to bed and no i was not still drinking at 5am
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
