Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
He went bowling in his bathroom.. And shattered the toilet.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
I need to find out this kids work schedule. I need mustache rides on my lunchbreaks.
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
oh my god. picked the worst day ever to not wear underwear...
I'm just gonna stop you right there because there is, in fact, no such thing.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
Of course the sales lady was judging you, you bought a pregnancy test, ky jelly, diet pills and a 6 pack of red bull. Even i'm judging you.
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