I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
the cop found his r2d2 bong and asked me if i ever smoked out of him. i'm like, no sir. he's like ahh. if i were to smoke, it'd definitely be out of some star wars character.
easily made my night.
Last night you were throwing up in my toilet singing "all by myself."
Randomize
